Sometimes... Some Days.. I wish... Oh, how I wish!

I know the title of my blog for today makes no sense. It is just one of those days where things don't seem exactly right. You know the idea. Sometimes I just wish (fill in the blank). Some days I would/could just (fill in the blank). I wish (fill in the blank). But, today, I can answer all those questions.

SOMETIMES:

Sometimes I just wish that things would go the way I want them. Sometimes I just things would work out in a logical manner that makes total sense to others. For example, if I have more credit card debt, I am rewarded by creditor. That makes no sense! If I want a higher credit score, I give myself more debt? Weird!

SOME DAYS:

Some days I wish that I had never been born. Some days, I just wish I wouldn't wake up in the mornings. Some days I wish I understood human nature more than I do. Some days I just wish I wasn't me any more because I am so sick of being me that I am finding it gagging. Me is not a good person to be. Wouldn't wish being me on any living human being.

I WISH:

I wish that there were a multitude of jobs that didn't require being a cashier. I wish my job paid more than I put out in a month. I wish that Stephen understood me and I understood him more. I wish that all the cats of the world had great homes. I wish my anger didn't the better of me more often than not. I wish my parents lived closer. I wish I could see my family more often.

OH, HOW I WISH:

Some days, I just am constantly wistful about wishing. For example, today, I wish that I understood what to do next when packing up the room to move this weekend. I just don't know what to do next. And, that bothers me.

Anyone know a good way to not allow my anger to get the better of me? I'm really tired of needed to fight the fight or flight instincts. Open for suggestions here.